Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Pictures Galore!

Susan G Komen Race for the Cure

Okay I know this is a little late but I have been pretty busy with work, school, doing my hair (jk I don’t have any), and doctor apts out the ying yang. Thank You Thank You Thank You to everyone who walked in my honor!! I not only had friends and family walk here in TX but friends in other states walk too! It means so much to me that everyone got up so early and walked. I truly feel so loved by so many and you guys are what help me keep going through this tough battle. It is such a blessing to have so many great people in my life. I was not able to attend the race this year because I was pretty sick. Here are a bunch of pictures from the race that I have been sent via Text and stolen from my friends on facebook! Enjoy :)
Here is a link to all the pics to view as well:

I have finished my hard treatment of “The Red Devil”!! WOOHOO!! I am so happy you have no idea!! Heavinly Father has given me the strength to go through the worst part and feel happy again! Thank you for all the prayers everyone :) I feel like this cancer can only get easier from here! In my opinion, the red devil was the hardest part! I am not even worried about the mastectomy because I do not think anything can be worse than your body being poisoned. I start my next treatment ( I have a total of 4) on Thursday Oct 28 on my Nanas Birthday. Taxol is supposed to be a walk in the park compared to The Red Devil! With all this being said, I am trying to talk Ryan into getting me a celebration gift for finishing the Red Devil. (Tory Burch Boots) but it is not working. My subliminal messages I leave around the house are not subliminal enough I guess :)

I wanted to give all you gals out there a reminder to make sure you are getting mammograms and doing self exams! Please know the importance of checking your Ta-Ta’s!! Make sure you are doing it once a month. It only takes 25 seconds to do a self check. I know it is boring so I have created a resourceful convenient list of fun places to do a self check at!

1. Since we all spend a lot of time in the car… why not in the car on your way to work? I mean you’re already jamming out to your favorite soundtrack, getting your coffee buzz by your morning java, so jam out and do a little check real quick! Of course safety first… so make sure you are parked! I promise, no one will think this is weird.
2. While you are having your portrait painted. This is the prime moment for a self check.
3. While you are planting a tree. You are killing two birds with one stone ladies! Helping the earth and helping you!
4. While you are getting to know your new neighbors. They will love you once you do your self check in their presence! Don’t bring them food, the self check is a great way to say “Welcome to the Neighborhood!”
5. While your asking for a raise at work. You will definitely get the raise!! This is a perfect idea, why hasn’t anyone ever thought of this?
6. While you are riding the Trans-Siberian Express across Asia. Because I know everyone will be riding this soon.
7. While you are swimming with dolphins. Try not to drown.
Have a great day everyone and thank you for reading my blog…fight like a girl!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Bald is the new Black!

I had chemo yesterday and had to go in this morning for a bone marrow shot and a IV for fluids and for nausea. I also go in the next 3 days for fluids and nausea IV's. This keeps me on top of my sickness... so right now I am happy :)
Since I was starting to look like an alien I decided to shave my head completely!
So I am bald! It was not sad or depressing to me. I was kinda like "whoa this is nuts". It's not everyday your going to shave your head! Pretty wild feeling. I was just standing there with my mouth wide open shaving my head. A chick, shaving her head. I can not really tell were my forhead ends, haha. It all blends in. Definitely not feelin' much like me but it is way more convenient than all those crazy little hairs pokin out all over the place. It is crazy how one day I have the thickest hair and the next I am sportin' a bald new doo. Hope ya like it because it is here to stay for the next few months! :)

I also got a European real hair wig! It is beautiful, comfortable, and blond! I have tried to be blond on several occasions in my life but it really never turned out right. One time I turned my hair yellow and thought I was hott stuff! Another time I was Orange and thought "Ooh baby I look good"! But the whole time I looked like a mess. Thank you Katy and Crystal for letting me leave my house with such dreadful hair :) But this new European blond wig is awesome! I feel great when I wear it and am so happy Deb did her research and got it :)It is such a pretty color blond and is so comfy! I can cut it, color it, and style it anyway I want! So if you are going through hair loss or chemotherapy, or just want to change up your hair flair... I would suggest a European Real Hair Wig. They are bad to the bone!

I had my last Red Devil treatment yesterday!!! Woo HOO!!!! THANK YOU!!! No more of the worse possible shit you could ever imagine harming and bringing pain and everything else bad in my body!! Sorry I am not a potty mouth, but there is not other word in the English dictionary to describe that horrible treatment. I have 4 more treatments of a lighter dose called Taxol left and then off to get giant boobs AKA mastectomy, maybe radiation and I am DONE! I am making it sound like it is like 2 months away, but I have a about a good year left. I am just so excited for when I am sitting in the doctors office and hear my Doctor say "You are cancer free". I am trying to think of what to say when he gives me the good news. Maybe I will say "Awesome!!" and do some sort of shimmy with my chest with a huge smile or "Heck yeah and jump with tons of glee and joy!" OR "SHUT THE FRONT DOOR" in a more serious tone or just cry and say thank you. Probably the last one. I am a cryer these days so probably cry my butt off with happy tears!!!
I wanted to thank everyone again for having me in your prayers! Heavinly father has been so good to me allowing me to have strength and for my body to kick this cancers butt. So thank you thank you thank you for having me in your thoughts and prayers :)
I am off to get better from chemo yesterday and... fight like a girl!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Sick Of Fighting

Brace yo’ self:
I hate this, I hate this, I freakin’ hate this. It has taken everything from me to update my blog because I really do not want too. I am so tired of having cancer, being sick, not being able to workout, seeing the color pink, talking about Breast Cancer, and thinking I am only 25 what the hell!! I am tired of being positive and tired of being strong when I feel like I have been hit by a bus and stricken with a crazy flu all at the same time. I just want to lie in my bed, scream into the pillow, and chug a beer. I normally hate beer but I have not had a drink in 3 months. I am not a big drinker but I just want a damn beer. I am not a depressed, negative, unhappy person and I am by no means giving up or becoming weak, I am just tired of feeling horrible. So I am letting my wonderful support system take this from me and be strong for me. I went so long without crying and being sad but now is my time to be sad and just let my loved ones catch me as I am falling. So for now- You may not get very many updates on my blog. I am a little tired at the moment. I will when I am feeling better but for the next few weeks you will have to call or email if you want an update on me :)

But just to let you in on what has been going on in the life of a Cancer patient…
1.My last treatment of the red devil is on Monday 10/11. It should get easier after this treatment. Unfortunately, I have one more week of pure hell. And no even though it is my last treatment of this poison I am not excited. At all.
2.My second set of 4 treatments are called “Taxol” and are supposed to be easier. With side effects being body aches instead of nausea! Yay! I will take body aches over wanting to puke any day.
3.I have been seeing plastic surgeons to discuss double mastectomies. My feelings on this: It is overwhelming and makes me cry. Especially when you google “Double mastectomies” at 3 am. CAUTION! Don’t do it, it will make you scream then have nightmares. Luckily, the pictures I saw were from the 1930’s not 2010. Thankfully, there are amazing surgeons now who can put boobs back together. Since one of these bad boys is trying to kill me you better believe I am getting both these cut off! Big ol’ boobies here I come!
4.My tumor is SHRINKING!!!! I can barley feel it! It once was a ping pong ball chillin’ in my boob, now it is like a little thumb tack just hangin out, ya know being a pain in the ass.
5.I start school back next week! I took a 60 day leave and was ready to go back by day 3. I am ready to get back to studying. I have missed my Psychology.
6.The Susan G Koman race is coming up and I will post pictures and all that jazz from the race!! Although I can not walk it, I will be there in spirit.

Till next time... Fight like a Girl